In Memoriam
Condolences:
Caitlin Wright Binning
June 29, 1966 - July 25, 2003
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Dear Tim,
I am sorry to have taken so long to write. I've been pondering
what to say, and along comes this e-mail from someone I don't know
who really pays eloquent tribute to Caitlin. I want to share it with
you. For myself, I always will love Caitlin for her devotion to
human truth. Not just Truth in the grandiose and abstract, but the
truth of people's lives. Certainly, from a newspaper reporter's
perspective, Caitlin was a mother lode of truth because she always
was able to back up what she said with people and their families who
could prove it. She was a bureaucrat's worst nightmare because she
cut through the gauzy haze of untruth like a knife. But Caitlin also
was true to people, which is why I think she forged such strong
relationships with the people she helped and the people with whom
she worked in one way or another. She was merciless on those she
considered adversaries of justice and human care, but she also was
incredibly warm and fun and irreverent and beautifully open. Her
truth was always richly human, as funky as we all know that can be.
What a loss. Please take care, Tim. I do not know if I will be able
to attend the service or not. I have some complications, but I will
try. Regardless, please know that I honor Caitlin's memory and
grieve with you in your loss. Best to you,
Michael
Maureen -
We all enter this world hoping ... that when our work is done,
we've left it a better place. Caitlin's advent to the earth was a
blessing for all of those fortunate enough to have known her and
loved her, even those of us who have loved her through you. Your
loss is shared by all. Every mother shares your pain. Allow each of
us to be here for you, and gently love you through this most
difficult time in you life.
Dear Maureen,
You would be Caitlin's mother. I am Bill Miller, and I live with
my wife Julia and daughter Allison. I work for the post office in
Lynchburg. I served on an advisory council to the Department of
Rights for Virginian's with Disabilities (DRVD) from 1996-2000.
Caitlin joined the group towards the end of my service, and we
became very good friends. Caitlin was such a lovely person. I had
not seen Caitlin since before she was married to Tim, but we
communicated occasionally by email. Caitlin told me when she was
first diagnosed with cancer. I was aware of the chemotherapy and
radiation, and then her surgery and physical therapy. The last I
heard, she was doing well. Then I was distracted by my surgery. I
had quintuple bypass surgery in December. In June, Caitlin notified
me that she was still battling cancer, and she was "slowing
down". Then I found her web site and sensed it was a memorial
of sorts. I became afraid that I would never see or hear from her
again. I called a friend of my wife's, who happens to live up the
street from Tim and Caitlin. I asked if she would go down and
inquire of Caitlin on my behalf. Susan did this, and repotted that
Tim came to the door and was very kind. My wife's friend did not
sense that Caitlin was gravely ill at the time. Tim has since
emailed me to tell me that he informed Caitlin that I was asking
about her. Tim stated that she spoke kindly of me and seemed happy
to know I was asking about her. This information means a lot to me.
I plan to attend the services on Saturday Aug 2nd. I have visited
Brian Larkin's internet site as well as the family history on
Caitlin's web page. You have a very interesting family. I hope to
have the opportunity to meet you and share more memories of your
wonderful daughter. She did tell me how much she enjoyed working
with you in her yard and flower gardens. Sincerely,
Bill Miller
Dear Maureen,
It's Caitlin's friend Lori Berkey here, just wanting to send you
my heartfelt condolences for the loss of your dear daughter Caitlin.
The love and support you gave her surely gave comfort to her
struggle. My life will forever be touched by the privilege of knowing
her and being her friend. Her goodness will live on endlessly in
ways that can't be counted...from people with mental illness whose
lives are better because of her advocacy...to friends, family and
others inspired by her strength and courage and ever present good
humor. My thoughts are with you during your time of sorrow. May you
be comforted by fond memories and the knowledge that she lives on in
all of all our hearts. Wishing you peace,
Lori
Dear Auntie M;
I've been truly worried about you. Not worried, more sad. I
shared this with my sister, and I left what she wrote below. But she
suggested that I "allow myself some joy".
I rarely do nice things for myself. It simply feels
"selfish". Yes, I know that is retarded. But anyway, doing
something "nice" and then dedicating that to someone makes
sense.
I'm going to a marketing event in the Catskills on Friday. There
is a business that is researching how to advertise and I was
invited. In exchange for my time, they will give me plane tickets to
anywhere I want to go in the world.
As you know, I have little interest in travel, but it just seems
like a "gift". So, that is how I'm taking it. I'm taking
my sister with me, and we're going to go to some wonderful place.
I'll have a wonderful time, and I'll dedicate the trip to Caitlin.
Since she really enjoyed travel I figure this is the right way to
celebrate her life. I'm sure she'd be very happy that I spread my
wings and experience joy because she inspired me to do so. Much love,
Steele
Maureen-
Thank you for passing along the sad news. Caitlin was so special
to me, and I'm so sorry that we've lost her. One of our special
bonds was that we both grew up with strong, independent moms who
taught us a lot about self-reliance. Thank you for all you did to
make her the extraordinary woman she was. Hope to see you. Saturday. love,
Kristin
Dear Maureen,
I came into the office this AM and saw this, and had
already seen it in the paper. Words cannot express my sorrow about
this, but I am relieved that Caitlin is no longer suffering in this
world. I am glad that Gretchen is a comfort to you. With my deepest
sympathy,
Shelly Klinger
Maureen
I am so sorry to hear about our loss-------we had such
wonderful times working together. Her smile and antics could Light
up a room. You have no idea how many people she will be missed
by--we all loved her so much. Your loss is immeasurable. If there is
anything I can do to help just please let me know. I know that her
pain is finally gone!
Sharon Mason
Maureen,
Thank you. I had not seen Caitlin for a few years. There
was a time that she was extraordinarily important to me and stayed
that way in my heart even when we went stretches without contact. I
will miss her. The world was a safer and more loving place with her
in it. With love and thoughts for all of you.
Sarah Paige
Dear Mrs. Wright,
Thank you so much for sending this out. We at hospice felt
blessed to have had the opportunity to get to know Caitlin, if only
for a short time. She was clearly much loved. Blessings to
you.
Carol Miller, Social Worker,
Community Hospice of Virginia
Dear Maureen
I am sending this e-mail to you from somewhere in Tennessee -
Winchester, to be exact, although I can't even tell you where that
is. I have been out of Richmond for almost two weeks, and am
visiting with a friend on the return trip home. She happens to have
aol, and I have not had an opportunity to check my e-mail until now.
My thoughts are with you at this time of your daughter's
transition, but as I've tuned in to the energy, I feel relief and
peace with her. She is fine - and I deeply appreciate being
informed. I'm glad that you have found peace and comfort with your
friends at the Alchemists, and I am honored to be one of them.
I will be home sometime Thurs., most likely. If you'd like to
talk - either in person or on the phone - please let me know. I
would be honored to do that with you. In Love and Light,
Lisa
Aunt Betty and Uncle Brian,
I am so sorry to hear about Caitlin's passing. I know you were
all very close to her and that she was a strong women right up until
the end. Please know that we are thinking of you and are so very
sorry for your loss.
JVPB (Jill)
Brian
I was extremely saddened when I heard the news of Caitlin's
death. I know she was special to you and Betty and I am grateful
that I was able to meet her last summer. Please extend my feelings
to her mother. Love,
Jean
Dear Betty and Brian
When young people go it seems so wrong. When an old fogy stops it
should not cause a tear, but I know how close you were to Caitlin
and how hard it was lose her. My thoughts are with you.
Dad
[John Richard VanderPutten is Aunt Elizabeth's
92-year-old father.]
Dear Uncle Brian and Aunt Betty,
We are all sorry for your loss.
It is always hard when you lose a loved one, but losing someone whom
you had raised and had to watch suffer is almost cruel. We hope she
has passed over to a better place and time, a place without pain.
All our love,
Basil, Dawn , Jonathan and Aurora.
Our deepest sympathies to your family.
Laurie Loken
Dear Brian and Betty:
Pat and I send our heartfelt condolences for your terrible loss.
We will remember Caitlin and you in our prayers.
Pat & John VanderPutten
Dear Betty and Brian
I am so sorry! you are all in our prayers. love
Pat Moore
Dear Maureen
Your news was not unexpected but it still causes the
grief we all feel when someone so close is taken from us. I think
that most families experience episodes of tragedy in their lifetime
and my own family had it repeated during the 2nd. war I would think
that from the beginning this would be the eventual result but one is
always hopeful that a miracle will happen and I was quite amazed how
anyone had the spirit and resilience to stand the treatment which
Caitlin had. It was a great pity that it was not more beneficially
rewarded. Few people would have lasted the course but even with the
short period of our acquaintance it was obvious that in Caitlin we
were dealing with someone with a mental and physical make-up given
to few people. ..I hope that in the end it came with little pain and
discomfort. Marie and I can only express our sincere sympathy to
yourself to Tim and the rest of the family
James and Marie and
Therese
To Caitlin's Family
I am truly blessed to have known such a wonderful human
being.
Regin Smith
D19CSB
Elizabeth
I was so sorry to hear of your niece's death. She
obviously eant a great deal to you. Yu and your family are in my
thoughts and prayers.
Barbara
Elizabeth
I was devastated to hear the news. Will write to Brian.
So glad to have seen your pictures of her and to have heard of her
bravery.
Deh-I
Dear Elizabeth
This is just so sad. You and your family are in my
prayers.
Barry
Elizabeth
It is so so sad. One digs deep to know how to deal with
such loss beyond mere remembering.
Sade
Elizabeth
My deepest and most sincere sympathies. Love and
support,
Jan D.
Dear Elizabeth,
It is a really tough thing to deal with. My deepest
sympathy.
Mary, Sarita, Walter, Demonica
Elizabeth
My deepest Sympathy
Julia
Elizabeth
I know that it is always tough, whatever the
circumstances. Much sympathy and support.
Gregory
Elizabeth
I know that it is difficult for you and your family. You
can be assured that we are all grieving with you and your family.
Larry
Elizabeth
My prayers (as always!)
Sadie
Elizabeth
My sympathy to you. It is always so hard.
Kan
Elizabeth
You are in my prayers.
Bernice, John Chernashevsky, Bonita Washington,
Jaime Malwitz
Elizabeth and Brian
A Mass has been said for Caitlin Wright Binning.
Love
Dick and Peg
Aunt Betty and Uncle Brian
A Mass has been said for Caitlin Wright Binning.
Love,
Rich and Meg
Val
I share your loss. God doesn't let any of his bright lights
stay ablaze too long. We should have known anyone that good was too
good to be true.
Fred Kaufman
Val;
I am very sad to learn that such a wonderful person has died. You
never know who is out there standing up for our rights, teaching us
to deal with things etc. And to think that the Daily Planet was not
wanted in neighbors in my city Richmond, Va, with fine workers like
Caitlin. Val keep up the good work. I know that it will be hard to
replace such a wonderful woman.
d t
Val
I hadn't seen the paper and learn of this tragedy until now.
Thanks for letting me know. I'll be in mourning of our collective
loss for quite a while.
Harry
Val
The most fearless, courageous, funny and wonderful advocate has
died. Please see Val Marsh's remembrance of Caitlin. She went into
the very darkest places and forced the windows open. The stories
that rocked Virginia on abuses in hospitals (and CSB's) were
unearthed by Val Marsh and Caitlin. Many of the changes that
happened were due to Caitlin. She was one of us.
Ray Bridge
Oh, Val
I am so sorry. This came as a complete shock to me.
Caitlin did so much in her short life, and it is a tragedy to lose
her. All my sympathy.
Pat Passalacqua
Val,
I just heard about Caitlin about an hour ago.... The world
has lost an incredible advocate and an awesome woman. I hope she
knew that the world is a better place because of her zealous
advocacy and compassion.
Dana
I just heard about Caitlin, and I wanted to offer my condolences.
I know that you two were close and that Caitlin was a wonderfully
strong and valuable advocate for the many people she served and/or
worked with over the years. My thoughts are with you as her friend
and colleague and of course with her husband and family.
Heidi
May I and my staff of Families 1st of VA, and Christian Nannies
offer each of you our sincerest condolences in the passing of
Caitlin. Whenever a group loses a member the loss is great. However
when you lose a member who has been such a vital part of your
progress, it is far more hard to deal with. May the our Lord .. be
with you in your time of loss, and comfort you, and give you not
only the strength, but also the determination to carry on in the
pathway laid before you.
Having worked with you and Caitlin, I became fully aware
about what an awesome pair you two were. I pray that the memories
which you hold will not make you sad, but will inspire you to
continue the awesome fight which you have put forth for so many of
those who would have no voice - except through you and Caitlin. MY
prayers and my staff's are with you and your staff as you grieve and
then move forward in carrying out your work In peace.
Carolann
Pacer-Ramsey
Executive Director Families 1st of VA Christian Nannies
& Companions & Staff
Dear Folks:
I apologize for waiting so long to express my feelings about the
loss of Caitlin, perhaps because I still can't believe she is gone
at such a tender age. Her spirit and her devotion to the vulnerable
among us still live in and inspire me, as they have since I first
wrote about Gloria Huntley in January 1997.
When it came to ferreting out the truth in state hospitals
Caitlin was the pit bull and the mental health system the poodle. It
was an uneven match from the start.
Countless thousands continue to benefit from her tireless work.
Such is a legacy few can claim.
Bill Baskervill
Mr. Baskervill is an Associated Press writer who
helped Caitlin in getting state and national visibility for her
cause.
We grieve with you Val. Thanks to your guidance. Caitlin and I corresponded several times
and I don't think I offended her. I expressed admiration for
her courage and how she used her impending death to guide her life
in the last days. I have tried to learn from her example and keep my
mortality fresh in my mind. Whether we have moments, months, or
years left, we need to order our daily lives like there is no
tomorrow. Caitlin did that very well. My prayers are with you,
because I know how much she meant to you.
Jerry
Val,
This is the most beautiful, heartwarming tribute I have ever
seen. Even though I did not know Caitlin, I am greatly saddened with
her passing. I hope and pray her work will inspire all of us to
continue, each in our own way, what she began. With heartfelt thanks
and deep appreciation for your sharing with us.
Nancy Gum
Val,
I appreciate your tribute so much, and I am sorry for your
personal loss of such a dear friend and comrade. You may know that
Caitlin worked for me at d19 csb. She was always passionate and
outspoken, and sometimes caused administrators some anguish by her
radical approach to advocacy....wanting to picket outside the
nastiest of our Adult Care Residences, rather than take the slow
political route of talking with them about violations and addressing
unmet concerns through DSS licensing body. I always admired her so
much and saw how she grew into such a competent leader in our field.
You and Caitlin have made the world a lot better place for our
clients and family members. Thanks so much for all you do. God bless
you and your staff as you heal.
Renae Sands
Dear Val,
Your tribute to Caitlin deeply touched my heart. Thank
you for sharing with us your memory of her. I grieve for you in your
lost of your sister. You and Caitlin were truly joined at the head
and heart as together you tenaciously fought for our loved ones.
June Poe
on behalf of NAMI Roanoke Valley
Thank you for writing such a beautiful message about Caitlin. It
started the tears all over this morning, as it reminded me again of
what a wonderful, unique person she was and how I will miss her
presence. I have been thinking of you, as well, and hope that you
are finding peace in your loss. I will see you Saturday.
Amy
To: VAMI and Caitlin's Family:
My sincerest condolences,
and condolences from all those who knew her at RBHA, to Caitlin's
family and to VAMI. Caitlin was a special person with a passion for
what was right and a determination to help those most vulnerable in
our society. Her innumerable contributions have had a tremendous
beneficial impact on the responsibility of the state of Virginia to
both understand and meet the needs of the mentally ill. She will be
greatly missed, but her spirit and work will carry on. With
Sincerity,
Steve Ashby
Executive Director
Richmond Behavioral Health
Authority
The
Passing of Caitlin Wright Binning Caitlin was one off the most
amazing individuals I have very met. She really was my hero and
someone that you could always count on for help in any situation.
Had it not been for Caitlin, I don't know what I would have done
when my family was stricken with mental illness. Caitlin was my
guiding light through the maze and darkness. After helping me, she
became my friend. Many of the improvements in the Virginia Mental
Health System over the last 7 years can be attributed directly to
her passion for helping people. Caitlin taught me to look past the
illness and see the person. That made all the difference in the
world. When I think of Caitlin, an Emerson quote comes to mind,
"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is
no path and leave a trail." I shall miss her terribly,
Bob
Williams
Dear Val Marsh,
I met you only briefly in Charlottesville when
you came to speak to our NAMI group, and am grateful for being able
to put a face on your beautiful tribute to your dear friend Caitlin
Wright-Binning. To have had such a friend must be some consolation
for your grievous loss. I am so sorry, for you, for her family, and
for this broken world. Sincerely,
Virginia Germino
Phil Floyd here. I must say that I can barely find the words to
express my extreme sadness. During my days as President of Virginia-IAPSRS
I got to know Caitlin through our work on the Mental Health Council
of the VACSB and cherished the friendship that developed. Thanks for
sending this out. Most sincerely,
Phil
I am so terribly sorry to hear about Caitlin's death. You have
done her justice in your eulogy. Even those who didn't know her will
know why she was such a special person, and will remain so in many,
many hearts in Virginia for years to come. My prayers are with you,
Tim and Caitlin's family.
Leslie Herdegen
Dear Val:
I was astonished and incredibly saddened to hear of
Caitlin's death. She was so young and just embarking on so many new
adventures in a life already rich with experience, relationships,
and gifts to thousands of Virginians. I was so pleased to work
closely with her during my short tenure on the Board of NAMI-Virginia
and as Chair of the Program Committee. She was on top of the major
issues and a great team player when we were dealing with difficult
issues. She will be greatly missed by many, many folks. Please
accept my condolences to you, Tim, and Caitlin's family for your
loss and let me know if there is any way I may help.
Carolyn
Dear Val:
I am truly sorry to hear of the death of Caitlin, down
right saddened. I held her in high regard and thoroughly enjoyed her
dry sense of humor. Her commitment was beyond admirable.
Richard E. Kellogg
Special Assistant/F&A
(Note: Richard Kellogg
was the commissioner for DMHMRSAS under the Gilmore Administration)
Val,
Thank you for sending me the e-mail concerning Caitlin's
passing away. Needless to say I was deeply saddened to learn of her
death, she will be deeply missed. As you know, Caitlin stood between
my son Chris (a consumer) and total disaster on many, many
occasions. She did everything for him from securing a proper
treatment plan through consultation, to brute force if needed, with
his doctors and staff at Western State and halfway houses, placing
him in assisted living quarters that would best meet his needs,
locating and recovering him from multiple states when he ran away
and, providing me with aid and comfort when I thought I would lose
my mind with worry. God, how I will miss her. Caitlin was the Joan
of Arch of the mentally ill. As to her very early departure from all
of us, I think God most likely promoted her. He knows a fearless
fighter when he sees one. My love, thoughts and prayers to Caitlin,
her family, fellow warriors at NAMI-Virginia and to you Val.
Caitlin's spirit, in all its manifestations, will live on in all of
us.
For Caitlin:
Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul,
And
sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all,
And the sweetest in the gale is heard;
And sore must be the storm
That could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm.
I've heard it in the chillest land,
And on the strangest sea;
Yet, never, in extremity,
It asked a crumb of me.
Emily Dickinson
Dave O'Neill
Val:
I was shocked and deeply saddened to get the news upon my
return from the beach. I am especially sorry for your personal loss,
and of course, the loss to the advocacy community. As you know,
Caitlin was a joy and inspiration in my own teaching and community
work and I will miss her dearly.
KJB
(Note: Dr. Kia Bentley is a
professor at the VCU School or Social Work who worked closely with
Caitlin on a number of projects, and who clearly admired her.)
Val,
I was touched by your beautiful remembrance of your friend.
She was oh too young! I just remember her name when I had called
several years earlier, but your sharing made her a permanent marker
in my mind. I do wish we could clone people like you and Caitlin.
Thanks for all you do as well.
Brenda Hayes
Val,
I was out of town and just now received this message. I am
in shock for both deaths: Dick's (I was not aware he had died this
past January) and Caitlin's. They were magnificent people and it is
just incredibly difficult to cope with the idea that they are no
longer around to enlighten us. Big hug for you, my friend,
Sonia
Jurich
Val & Staff,
I am very sad to learn of Caitlin's death.
She was a true advocate and a person dedicated to social justice.
She accomplished so much in her short life. My thoughts and sympathy
are with you and her family.
Tommie Cubine (Note: Tommie Cubine
served on the board of directors of NAMI-VA for many years. Caitlin
worked with her extensively, especially on family education
programming.)
Val,
I'm stunned. My god, I'm so sorry to hear this. And if I'm
feeling this way, I can only imagine what you [and her family] are
going through. What a loss, in every sense of the word. I still
can't comprehend it somehow. My thoughts are with you and others who
knew Caitlin better than I did. It sounds so stupid, but I don't
know what else to say or think.
Ann MacDonald
Wakefield, RI
Dear
Val,
I was shocked and very upset when I picked up the
newspaper Tuesday morning to read "Binning, advocate for
mentally ill in Virginia dies." I knew Caitlin had been ill,
but somehow I thought with her youth and tenacity she would overcome
e her illness. I held Caitlin in the highest regard. She was very
bright, understood. the mental health system and the political
system. And that made her highly effective in her advocacy role...She was a great resource to me and vet responsive, I
always knew where I stood with Caitlin. I liked how inpatient
and irreverent she was... that vas part of what made her so
genuine. I know that Caitlin was an important part of the NAMI-VA
family and I am certain she very important to you personally. I want
to let you know how terribly sorry I am about her loss. My thoughts
are with you and your staff.
James E. Forrester, Ed.D.
Clinical Director
Maureen
Catlin certainly affected my life. The Nami Va
Consumer counsel and Catlin gave me the lift that sustained me to do
the recovery work I continue to do with my peers in the State of VA
and elsewhere. A true hero is the person who works tirelessly for
others with no expectation of reward.
Yvonne Smith
Maureen
Caitlin
helped so many people. She
fulfilled her mission in life and has now gone on to another plane
to continue her work. When
she became ill and after the surgery, she worked very hard in OT/PT.
In fact, she finished before her deadline because of her
resolve.
We should follow her example of striving hard to do your best
because that’s how she lived her life. She
is now out of pain and is in a better place. She
will be greeted by loved ones waiting for her. These
are the words you used to comfort me and I appreciate it.
As I promised they are coming back to you. Love,
Martha
Martha is a nurse with whom I worked for several years, and as soon
as I mentioned her distress to Caitlin, Caitlin was right there
helping her. That was perhaps 10 or more years ago and I don't think
they ever met. Martha is now retired. She and her husband drove up
to the Memorial Service.
Maureen
My thoughts and prayers are with you. I had the joy of
working with Caitlin for several years as the Mental Health Director of
the Community Services Board in Chesapeake and Norfolk. She taught me
much, and made this world a much better place for all. She will be
missed. God bless you.
Martin Phillips
Dearest Maureen
My deepest condolences go out to you and all of
Caitlin's family.
I know that any words are a poor comfort but
please know that my heart goes out to you and I wish I was there to
hold you and help to ease the pain for a moment. Yours is the
heaviest burden to bear, the loss of your child and you will always
have that with you. Time will lessen the pain, although that might
seen unlikely at the moment. Caitlin will hold her hand over you and
will want you to take good care of yourself - we are so many who
need you.....I love you
Caitlin was obviously a very very special person,
one who will be missed by her family, her co-workers, community and
the community at large - she was an Angel on earth.
You will be in my thoughts on the 2nd of August
(my 50th birthday) and I will pray that you get the strength to come
though that day.
As is your wishes I will honour Caitlin by sending
a donation to NAMI-VA.
I will be in Ireland from the 31st July until the
21st August.
Dearest Maureen may God be with you in this your
darkest hour. All my love,
Fiola X
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